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| Jan 2003 | Feb 2003 | March 2003 | April 2003 |
| May 2003 | June 2003 | July 2003 |
Story #1
When I was in about the fourth grade, I was in the city-wide spelling bee representing my grade school. The spelling bee took place in Maison Blanche, a department store in New Orleans. Anyway, I was wearing this cream suit that my father had gotten me for Easter. I called it my "Smooth Criminal" suit because of its slight resemblance to the one Michael Jackson wore in that video. You couldn't tell me SHIT when I had that suit on. I was "so fresh and so clean" before OutKast was even a group. I think I even rocked a blue shirt. I was like Ghostface Killah on that old Raekwon skit: "Blue and cream!"Anyway, I made it through the first couple of rounds to the intermission. My father came up to me during the intermission and told me I was doing well. He asked me if I had to use the bathroom, and I actually did, but I was too busy being "cool" in my Smooth Criminal suit so for some dumb reason, I said no. My exact words were probably: "Nah, I'm cool."
So y'all know what happened next, right? I went up to spell my next word in front of all those people and I guess I was so nervous that my bladder just let go. All over my cream Easter Sunday Smooth Criminal So-Fresh-And-So-Clean-Clean suit slacks.
Very un-cool.
I walked down the aisle to the bathroom (a bit too late, n'est- ce pas?) and the audience applauded. I guess they were trying to make me feel better, but I didn't even want the attention. Since it was a department store, my father bought me some jeans to wear. (Bless the man; he didn't even trip.) I went back to the spelling bee, misspelled the next word on purpose, and went home. Luckily, none of my school friends were there, and all the principal announced at school that Monday was that I represented the school very well. Good thing, too. I don't think I would have ever lived that one down.
ANSWER:
SHO'NUFF
Yup. It happened just like that. That was probably my most embarrassing moment ever. Don't tell anyone. I don't think I would be able to live that one down.