The No Frills FAQ about Droopy

THE STATS (PERSONALITY PROFILE)

NAME: Drew David Anderson the First

NICKNAMES: Droopy, Droopeezy, Peezy, Drew-Bear (only for certain special ladies), Druid, Drew-salem (to Lee), Drew-Ha (for Boot Camp fans), Drew Lee (Komplex called me that after I featured at Gallery 409 in a Kung Fu outfit), Deuce (high school rap moniker)

SEX: yes, please (sorry, couldn't help it)

MARITAL STATUS: See the poem "Looking For Wifey" from my book "Feel No Way"

HEIGHT: 5'10" (I hope, because I used that in a rhyme: "The empire within my five-ten frame is not about the jivin' and games but is fly like arriving in planes" - from the poem "My Philosophy", from the book "Feel No Way")

WEIGHT: 140 pounds (dripping wet)

WAIST: 30 inches

SHOE SIZE: 10

DATE OF BIRTH: March 14, 1978, around 4 in the morning, if I recall

ZODIAC SIGN: Pisces (boy am I ever)

SPIRITUALLY SIGNIFICANT NUMBERS: 2 and 22 (I was the second child, my little emcee alias back in the day was "Deuce-Deuce" because a 22 was a small weapon that could still kill, 2 or 22 was always part of my register number when I worked retail, and good things always happen to me on Tuesdays [get it? Two's day?] especially February 22)

SIBLINGS: two sisters

ACADEMIA: Audubon Montessori School in New Orleans (graduated 1991), Saint Augustine High School in New Orleans (graduated 1995), Howard University (B.S. in Biology, 1999), 2 years in Masters biology program at Howard

AFFILIATIONS: "Crew" Team (my dogs), illpoets, Poetology Slam Team Two, Howard Track, H.U. Louisiana State Club, Campus Pals, Phi Sigma Pi Honor Fraternity, Poutre (poetry organization)

QUALITIES: half-decent poet, good sense of humor, doesn't take himself that seriously, kind-hearted, looks out for others

FAULTS: can be somewhat self-absorbed, dry skin, eats too much junk food, receding hairline, very proud, doesn't like asking for help, has difficulty reciting faults upon demand, daydreams a lot, changes from first-person to third-person perspective in the middle of personality profiles to avoid awkwardness thus only creating a new awkwardness, goes off on long-winded (though often interesting) tangents, kind-hearted (to those who don't deserve it), looks out for others (who don't deserve it)

LOVES: music, poetry, blue colors, running, anything about New Orleans (especially the food), bread pudding, Skittles, Starbursts, Sour Patch Kids, Checkers fries, blunt honesty, crass senses of humor which don't make me feel bad about my own, old cartoons, women (much to my heart's undoing), getting cheap plane tickets (especially at the last minute), windy overcast days when it looks like it will rain but it doesn't, blueberry muffins, cinnamon, blueberry muffins with
cinnamon in them, homemade french toast, not capitalizing the "french" in "french toast" and not giving a shit, Clark shoes (especially wallabees), Spider-man, anything that reminds me of being a child, individuals, rebels, and underdogs, cleaning my ears out with Q-tips, my friends, the fact that my friends won't feel a way about being mentioned right
after "cleaning my ears out with Q-tips"

HATES, I MEAN, "DISLIKES" ("hate" is such a strong word): replacing the word "hate" with "dislike" just because "hate is such a strong word" even though it's what I really mean, being late (especially if people are waiting on me), people who feel obligated to give something a bad review just because they figure everyone else will love it, police who talk trash when they pull you over for speeding, train conductors who wait until they get right in front of you to honk their loud-assed horns, shady, fake people (me and my best friend Dana call them "Shadyville All-Stars"), not being able to remember something (especially if it's right on the edge of my memory), having to wake someone up from peaceful sleep, being tired as hell and not being able to fall asleep (i.e. on Greyhound buses), breaking fingernails, having to tell someone the same thing 25+ times before it begins to register (especially my students), stereotypes, close-minded people, Burberry clothes (and all other corny-assed fashion trends)

USED TO LIKE BUT NOT ANYMORE: name-brand clothes, roller coasters

DON'T PARTICULARLY DISLIKE, BUT AVOID DUE TO PAST EXPERIENCES: dating females who are Cancers, or who are Cancer-acting Geminis

USED TO NOT LIKE BUT NOW I DO: potato salad, reading newspapers for more than the comics

OBSESSIONS: neatness, making moves and being successful

PET PEEVES: people who leave CDs all over the place (especially if they're MINE!), people who close CD player trays by pushing them in, instead of pushing the open/close button, the way illpoets.com looks like "Illpoets.com" when you capitalize it in arial font, toilet paper positioned so that you have to pull it underhandedly, toilet paper where you can't find the fricking start of the roll, gratuitous toilet paper humor , inconsiderate people who think the world revolves around them, people who complain about shit but don't do anything to change it, defeatist attitudes toward life, people who aren't trying to experience anything new or unfamiliar, people who think you're "weird" just because you're not like them, people who will read this and insist that there is no difference between a "pet peeve" and a "hate/dislike"

MOST EMBARRASSING MOMENT: See Sike, Naw/Sho'Nuff story #1 from the "Come Play With Me" section of this site.

GREATEST FEAR: failure, not doing everything I want to do before I die

FAVORITE MUSICAL ARTISTS: Si*se, Bjork, Esthero, Portishead, Julie Dexter, Fertile Ground, AZ, Nas, Jay-Z, Biggie, Massive Attack, Mos Def, Miles Davis, Donald Byrd, Bahamadia, Emiliana Torrini, N.E.R.D., Kelis, Nelly Furtado, Everything But The Girl, Elbow, Baby Fox, Dot Allison, Baxter, Jill Scott, Erykah Badu, Adriana Evans, Davina, Ambersunshower, Amel Laurrieux, Res, Hive, Mac, Grand Puba, Black Moon, Smif n Wessun, Tony!Toni!Tone!, the original Lucy Pearl, A Tribe Called Quest, Lauryn Hill (especially as the emcee L-Boogie from the Fugees days), Big Pun, Hieroglyphics and Anti-Pop Consortium etc. etc. etc.

FAVORITE MOVIES: Spider-Man, Star Wars 2, Austin Powers 1 and 2, Training Day, Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon,Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring, Liar, Liar, Forrest Gump, The Hudsucker Proxy, Jerry McGuire, Malcolm X, Higher Learning, Rush Hour 1 and 2, Being John Malcovitch, Top Gun, American Pie, The Matrix, the Usual Suspects, Waterboy, Star Trek V, and all Pacino and Deniro movies especially Scarface, Devil's Advocate, Goodfellas, A Bronx Tale, The Never-Ending Story, Dark Crystal, and Casino. I love way more movies than that and I would be here all day if I listed them all.

THINGS I WISH I STILL HAD: The illusion that I understood everything (things seemed so much simpler when I had that), a Commodore 64 computer with games like "Impossible Mission", "Caveman Uggh-lympics", and "Pirates", my old G.I.Joe and Ninja Turtle toys (unopened), my old comic books (in mint condition), my ex-girlfriend (SIKE!! Then again, depends on which one you're talking about..), my St. Aug Purple Knights wool hat that I let bamma-assed Antonio Henderson borrow in like the 10th grade and he didn't come back to school the next year and if he's reading this he'd better know to watch his back!!

I'M HAPPIEST WHEN: relaxing, listening to some good music, playing video games on my back porch like I don't have a care in the world, in New Orleans, running, with my Crew, business is handled, bills are paid, apartment is neat, featuring at a poetry venue (especially if it's a venue or city I haven't done before and the crowd is feeling me)

WHAT I WOULD SAY TO BIN LADEN IF WE MET: "Dude, get a fucking life."

WHAT I WOULD ASK GOD IF WE MET: "Do you ever get tired of me always asking you the same thing?"

MAIN THING I WANT MY WEBSITE TO DO: Make people smile.

MAIN THING I WANT MY POETRY TO DO: Change the world.

The Autobiography of a Happily Disturbed Individual - The No Frills FAQ Sheet - The Quote-Unquote "Professional" Bio